Tag Archives: Male

Crooked 

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The Guardian Demon

An airhorn blasted through the apartment. Damien then took the noise-maker into the sole bedroom, blaring it again. “Rise and shine.”

Sadie pulled the blankets over her head with a loud moan. “It’s Saturday! I don’t work. Let me sleep.”

“I made pancakes!” He let off the airhorn again.

“This is cruel and unusual punishment.”

His face dropped. “Well. I am who I am.”

With another groan, she pulled herself out of bed. Shuffled into the kitchen. Her guardian close behind. Sadie plopped into a chair, glaring at Damien. “These better be the best pancakes, or I swear, I’ll–”

“You’ll do what?” He patted her head when he set a plate in front of her. “You can’t hurt me. But I can hurt you.” He winked.

She eyed him as he sat across from her. “How did I get stuck with the likes of you, anyway? I thought supernatural guardians were supposed to be angels.”

Damien frowned. “Hey, some demons, like me, are angels. Fallen ones but still angels. I got tired of Lucifer constantly complaining about you humans. The guy never stops. Am I not allowed to work towards what I once was?”

“Like I’d know. You think I’m an encyclopedia on supernatural knowledge? Think again.” Sadie took a bite of her pancakes. Eyes brightening when she tasted them. “Wow. These are good.” She pointed her fork at him. “Not good enough to wake me up at six A.M., though.”

Placing his chin in a hand, he smiled. “I’m glad you like them. I spent all night finding the perfect recipe. It’s a good thing I don’t need sleep.”

“But I do. How many times have we gone over this? And stop writing reminders on the bathroom mirror. I’m pretty sure you use blood, and I don’t need the FBI in here.”

His hands went up. “It’s animal blood, I swear.”

She spat out her pancake. “Are you insane?”

“Well…”

“Don’t answer that question.” She massaged her temples. “All the neighbors probably think I’m some sort of psycho maniac.”

Damien rolled his eyes. “Please. You act like I have no skill. Besides, it’s from roadkill. I’m not a complete heathen.”

“How is that any better? I swear–”

“You’re not supposed to swear.”

Sadie blinked. “What are you? My ‘personal demons’ manifested into a human male body? Because you are ridiculous.”

“Uh, no. Your ‘inner demon’ is Brittany. She’s one of the populars, so I don’t step on her turf.”

“What?”

“The ‘seven deadly sins’ are Brittany. Well, for you, anyway. Each person’s inner demons are usually just one demon. The inner demons are an elite hierarchy I stay away from. They’re all a bunch of snobs with their special powers and abilities.”

“You’ve been my guardian for, what, three months now? And every single day you manage to say something completely off-guard.”

“I’m ridiculously old. I have a lot of knowledge.”

She pushed herself away from the table. “I’m going to take a shower.”

He sighed through his nose as he watched her walk away. Mumbled to himself. “Didn’t even finish the pancakes. All the work I do around here, and what do I get? Nothing.” He cleaned up the mess from breakfast.

“Damien!” came a piercing screech.

His head sunk between his shoulders. She found his fresh message on the mirror. Then his eyes widened, tearing to the bathroom. He had forgotten to clean up his writing material.


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